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BDSM Glossary of Terms

Are you new to D/s and/or the world of BDSM? Have heard certain words or phrases used in the BDSM context but weren't exactly sure what they meant? Below is a list of some of the more commonly used words and phrases as they pertain to D/s or BDSM in general.

Aftercare: refers to the period of time after BDSM or D/s play, during which the participants--especially the submissive--process the intense feelings and emotions triggered during the scene. The dominant should support the submissive by encouraging discussion and helping to prevent subdrop from occurring.

Animal Play: a BDSM scene where the submissive acts like an animal, as in puppy play, pony play, etc. Animal Play is sometimes referred to as Animalism.

Ass Play: sexual stimulation of the anus with the tongue, fingers, butt plug, dildo, etc.

Ball busting: any kind of pain or discomfort applied to the testicles, such as squeezing, smacking, or binding

Ball Gag: a rubber ball placed in the mouth that is attached to a strap that fits the head to hold the ball securely in place.

Bat: a rigid but flexible instrument used for striking that is usually wrapped with braided leather or cloth. A bat is very similar to a crop except that it has a shorter shaft and a wider striking tip

BDSM: acronym for several terms(Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism) combined together to form BDSM.

Body Worship: the practice of a submissive adoring and/or idolizing the dominant's body, such as foot worship, ass worship, breast worship, etc.

Bondage: involves the act of restraining the submissive using rope, cuffs, bondage tape, or other types of restraints.

Boot Worship: often associated with shoe fetishism, the submissive licks, polishes, or kisses the dominant's boots.

Bottom: term used to identify the submissive in a D/s relationship.

Bottom Drop: sudden feelings of depression and unhappiness that can occasionally occur after an especially intense BDSM scene.

Boundaries: a term used to define acceptable and unacceptable experiences in a D/s relationship.

Breath Control: refers to the dominant controlling the submissive's breathing by some method, such as queening.

Chastity: a form orgasm denial that prevents orgasm by limiting or restricting access to the genitals with a device known as a chastity cage or a cock cage.

Coerced Bi: the act of a woman coercing a man into sucking another man's cock or having sex with another man

Cock and Ball Torture (CB): the sexual practice of intentionally inflicting physical discomfort or the threat of inflicting physical discomfort to the male genitals.

Collared Submissive: a submissive who is formally committed to and owned by a dominant through a ritual known as a collaring ceremony

Consent or Consensual: mutual agreement by both the submissive and the dominant of the terms of a BDSM relationship and/or scene.

Contract: a written agreement between the submissive and the dominant. Sometimes referred to as a slave contract.

Crossdresser: men who are sexually aroused by wearing women's clothing.

Cuckold: a man whose wife has sex with other men because of his inadequacies in the bedroom.

Cum Eating: the act of eating one's own cum.

Dom or Domme: a term that refers to the dominant person in a D/s relationship.

Dominant: the person who assumes control in a D/s or Dominant/submissive relationship

Dominatrix: a dominant woman who controls submissive men.

Dungeon: refers to a room that contains BDSM equipment, also known as play space.

Edging or Orgasm Edging: the act of bringing yourself to the very edge of orgasm and stopping just shy of ejaculation.

Enchantrix: an Enchantrix Empire Dominatrix.

Erotic Humiliation: Humiliation that causes sexual arousal in a person.

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Erotic Sexual Denial: When a dominant does not allow the submissive an orgasm for a period of time (usually in conjunction with cock teasing and orgasm edging).

FemDom or FemDomme: a dominant female and/or a type of BDSM play known as Female Domination (where the female is the dominant and the male is the submissive).

Feminization: the act of making a man more feminine through clothes and other actions.

Fetish: a condition where inanimate object(s) evoke sexual arousal.

Guided Masturbation: the process of one person directing the masturbation session of another.

Hard Limits: term used to refer to certain activities the submissive does not and will not under any circumstances consent to.

Impact Play: term used to refer to BDSM activities that involve impact or striking, such as spanking, flogging, cock and ball torture, etc.

Limits: term used to refer to certain activities the submissive does not want to do but over a period of time, may consent to exploring.

Masochism: term used to describe the act of receiving pain (either self-inflicted or inflicted by another).

Masochist: term used to describe one who enjoys receiving pain.

Master/slave: another term used to describe a type of D/s relationship where the dominant is the master and the submissive is the slave.

Masturbatrix: a FemDom who uses various cock control methods to control a man's masturbation habits.

Munch: term used to describe the meeting of a group of BDSM people in a restaurant or some other typically "vanilla" place.

Orgasm Control: term typically referring to the act of a dominant determining when or if a submissive will be allowed to gain orgasmic release.

Pain Slut: term used to describe a person who enjoys pain, erotic or otherwise.

Play Party: term used to refer to a group of people actively participating in BDSM activities at the same location.

ProDom or ProDomme: term used to describe a professional Dominatrix.

Sadism: term used to describe the act of inflicting pain on another (or others).

Sadist: term used to describe a person who enjoys inflicting pain on another (or others).

Safe, Sane, and Consensual: a phrase often used to describe responsible BDSM play.

Safeword: a word agreed upon by both the dominant and the submissive prior to D/s play that when repeated by the submissive during play removes consent to continue the play scene.

Scene: term used to describe BDSM activity that occurs within a specific time frame (also referred to as BDSM play).

Sensory Play: a D/s activity where the dominant pushes the submissives sensory limits through texture, sensory deprivation, impact play, edge play, etc.

Service Oriented Submissive: a term used to describe a submissive whose main focus is serving and pleasing the dominant by doing service oriented tasks, such as cooking, cleaning, etc.

Sexual Reassignment Surgery (SRS): medical process of changing a person physically changing a person from one sex to another (also known as as a sex change).

Sissy Training: training a feminized male in the ways of being a sissy.

Slave: a term sometimes used to refer to a submissive in a D/s relationship, as in Mistress/slave. Often used to refer a stricter D/s relationship where the submissive has given total control to the dominant, as in TPE.

Transgendered: term used to describe a person who identifies themselves as a gender other than their physical gender. Most commonly used to describe a physical male whose self-identity is female.

Transsexual: a male or female who feels they were born as the wrong gender.

SPH or Small Penis Humiliation: the act of humiliating a man due to the size of his inadequate penis.

Soft Limits: term used to describe activities a submissive does not enjoy but will do if the dominant so wishes.

Subdrop: refers to a period of time after particularly intense BDSM play where the submissive may become depressed, exhausted, and extremely emotional. Sometimes the submissive will even experience flu-like symptoms when subdrop occurs.

Subspace: refers to the euphoria or trance-like state the submissive experiences as a result of intense BDSM play.

Tease and Denial: purposely causing sexual arousal in a person through teasing, usually until they are near the point of orgasm, and then not allowing them to actually have the orgasm.

Top: the dominant partner in a D/s relationship.

Topping From the Bottom: when the submissive partner suddenly and without warning tries to take control over the dominant partner in a play scene. (usually not well received by the dominant)

Total Power Exchange or TPE: the giving (and receiving)of control over a person's body for the purpose of sexual arousal (a submissive gives control to the dominant).

Vanilla: term commonly used to describe "traditional" sexual behavior.

There you have it folks- some of other more common BDSM and D/s terms and phrases. Now you can enter the world of dominance and submission with the knowledge of an old pro!

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